Pressure on children to ‘be perfect’ is very dangerous, ‘pushy parenting’ spoils mental health

Pressure on children to 'be perfect' is very dangerous, 'pushy parenting' spoils mental health

New Delhi, June 29 (IANS). In today’s time, every parent wants to see the best in their child, but the problem starts when parents start imposing these expectations on their children and force them to be ‘perfect’. This is called ‘pushy parenting’ in psychological language. It may look like discipline and success on the outside, but on the inside it is dangerous for the mental development of the child.

According to psychology, pushy parenting means imposing one’s wishes on the child and forcing him to always be perfect. In this, it appears that the child is doing well, but inside he keeps feeling stressed. The child starts thinking only about performance rather than play, learning and happiness.

In pushy parenting, parents always expect the child to score the highest or be number one in every task. Even if the child gets good marks but is not able to top, he gets scolded. This makes the child feel that his hard work has no value. Gradually fear develops inside him. He accepts himself only when he lives up to the expectations of others.

The second sign of pushy parenting involves ignoring the child’s preferences. Many times a child is interested in some sport, art or hobby, but the parents push him towards the career or studies of his own choice. Due to this, the child starts suppressing his happiness and interest and tries to do only that which makes the parents happy.

Moreover, when children are compared with others, this habit weakens the child’s self-confidence. He starts considering himself inferior to others and gradually an inferiority complex may develop in his mind. Psychologists call this the self-doubt pattern, in which the child stops trusting himself.

It is often seen that parents start taking every small and big decision of the child themselves. Like what to wear, what to eat, whom to befriend or what to do in free time. When a child does not get a chance to take his own decisions, he is unable to become self-reliant. Even after growing up, he has to depend on others for everything.

Psychologists believe that it is important to give direction to children, but it is not right to put pressure on them.

–IANS

PK/AS

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